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The possibility of not being deemed worth ‘buying into’ disproportionately affects women, well outside of the bounds of the date itself.
And the repercussions of this core economic dynamic in dating are powerful.
A transparent Rick Owens shirt on top of tiny black shorts and some sort of boots implying just how smooth those legs must be to the touch.
Unaffordable housing markets, stagnant wages, austerity and widespread job precarity represent class violence that metes itself out along gendered and racialized lines even as racism and gender oppression are treated as though they were dead in many of the discourses of the western powers. Staging the process makes everybody’s uniqueness look commensurable.“Dating,” as it is currently known and practised, casts ordinary people as perfectible investment opportunities in competition with each other across myriad platforms (OKCupid; Tinder; Grindr; Match; Ashley Madison; Plenty of Fish, etc). But I need a bit of badass as well: black pants by The Cast, formalwear for skull-crackers. A white Thom Browne oxford, all the better to channel the designer's genteel nature. But they also wear what I wear when I'm going to the gym: Vans, shorts (pleated ones), old-looking T-shirts. While many men know this and use it consciously to communicate this, innocence is also no defence.One cannot escape this symbolic grammar, on a first date, simply by willing it away.